Bad (Maybe) Pictures of the Cast: K-Stew Edition

It’s finally time for Part Two in our Bad Pictures of the Twilight Cast series. Awhile ago, I did Rob, *ahem*…rather, I did A POST about Rob’s bad pictures. Now it’s Kristen’s turn to be scrutinized. I thought maybe some of you out there could use a break from all the Rob at Cannes coverage (btw, if you need a break from seeing hot Rob pictures and videos, seek therapy plz.)

OK, I’m going to be honest here. Kristen is so beautiful, it’s hard to find an actual BAD picture of her. Yeah, she looks a little gloomy in most pictures, but the “bish please” face works for her. So, as a result,  these are mostly going to be pictures that made me laugh because I thought they were weird in some way.

OK, so in this pic she looks a little cheery, carefree even. But what the F is she wearing? The main thing that assaulted my eyes were the God awful pants. At least I think they are pants. They could be shorts, and that makes them more horrific somehow. What are they made of? Leather? High wasted leather shorts that start right below her bra (and she is definitely wearing one since the strap is hanging out)? I’m completely confused by high fashion.

When I first saw this cover, it gave me a flashback to a random tidbit I read while trying to read/see/listen to everything Twilight related I could get my hands on. After I saw the movie, it was mentioned how they used hairpieces on Kristen so they could cut back on the time it took to style her hair. My first thought was, “They must have used A LOT of them.” because her head looks so flat here. Her hair is the second thing I’m most jealous of her about (first being the fact that Rob has a legitimate crush on her that he can’t stop mentioing in interviews, AND she gets to make out with him), but this is just not a good look for her.

Next, we all have seen this picture, and I for one never get tired of looking at it.

This picture was taken THE WEEK Twilight was released to theaters, and it is literally the first picture I saw of her after seeing the movie. I love this for so many reasons. First, that could be tobacco, but come on, we all know what’s in that pipe. She’s sitting out on a public sidewalk, barefoot with her boyfriend and completely oblivious to the fact that cameras are around. This is Kristen being real,and she has a “I don’t give a fuck” attitude and I honestly love that about her. The reason it’s on the bad list is because, well, this didn’t endear her to a lot of people, including parents. This may have royally pissed off the studio, but this is one of my favorite pictures of her.

 

In case you needed anymore proof that Kristen likes to get blazed,  I present the picture above. This is another one that makes me smile.

 

This picture is from a big photo shoot she did way before Twilight was made. It was one of those “The Next It Girls” or whatever they want to call it that teen mags do every few years. Most of the pictures are really beautiful, but I take issue with this dress. It looks like someone vomed stomach bile all down the front (sorry for that disgusting visual).

Here’s another one I also just think is adorable. This was taken on vacay with her boyfriend (that’s him in the white shirt) and his family, and it looks like they are enjoying some karaoke. I would never have the nerve to get up in front of all those people and do that, and that’s why she’s the actress and I sit behind a computer all day.

This is the only one of her that can actually be called “bad” in this entire post.

This picture and more like it have been making the rounds since Lainey Gossip posted them earlier this week, amidst all the Rob in Cannes craziness. When I first saw them, I didn’t think she looked completely horrible, I just thought she looked like she had just woken up. My face looks something like this when I don’t get my beauty sleep too. Lainey says Kristen had been up late smoking and drinking, but who knows? I would kill to look like her on her bad days.

Finally, the “bish plz” face she is a freakin’ expert at making.

 I’m working on mine every day, hoping to have one half as good as hers. It’s always a good idea to have a bitch face you can pull out anytime you need it.

So this  concludes the Kristen edition of Bad Pictures of The Twilight Cast. I realize that most of these pictures are not “bad”, but just go with it.

I’m not seeing how I can do another post on this with any other member of the cast. Ashley Greene has probably never taken a less than perfect picture in her life, neither has Rachelle Le Fevre. The only person I could even imagine a post like this about is MAYBE Jackson Rathbone, because he has lots of funky 100 Monkeys band pictures and he recently got a Mohawk for a movie role. We’ll see.

Hey everyone! We have moved our blog! To see our most recent posts, check us out at Twilog.net

Wal Mart Sucks: Part Two

Look at that picture. Rob knows what’s up.

When I was at Wal Mart last night with Jeremy picking up a few things, I had to go over to the “Twilight section” and see if they finally got some stuff in. I’m not going to be picky here, I just want some fraking buttons, maybe a key chain or two (or five). We headed over there, me a little warily. I wasn’t sure what we would find, considering what had happened last time.

There was nothing. Not even a shelf of unnecessary Doritos. There was a big empty spot where that shelf had been, and the wall was all filled up with the fug purses from last time. Even the big display signs were gone. 

I didn’t panic. I stayed calm and told myself they were probably just moving the display. While Jeremy went and stood in line for the check out, I asked at Customer Service  to see of they were moving the display to another part of the store. The woman working the counter told me, “Go to the fitting room, and they will show you where it is.”

I walked over to the fitting room, which is incidentally where the stuff HAD been. I suppose they thought I was stupid and needed to be lead the entire 5 feet there by an associate.

Two employees, girls about my age, were standing in the big empty spot and they looked as confused as I was. One of them said, “I just got here. I had no idea they were moving it!” She went to ask the girl in jewelery (really, I had been lead all over the whole store at this point) and she told us, “Yeah, that’s over, and they aren’t getting any more. That’s all that’s left.” and she pointed to one bracelet and one pack of buttons.

So. The moral of the story is go to your Wal Mart ASAP and buy what you want, because according to the employees at mine, they are not going to be carrying that stuff much longer. I think this is pretty stupid of them personally. I guess they don’t want to make more money or something. But all you lucky beotches go and buy your buttons and bags and key chains so I can live vicariously through y’all. 

Looks like they will be seeing me around at Hot Topic again.

-Whitley

Robert Pattinson: Outtakes Galore!

A lot of outtakes from some photoshoots Rob did last year were released today, and of course, he looks F-I-N-E as hell in most of them. 

Note that I said MOST of them. One of the photoshoots includes one of the pictures I used in my bad pictures of the Twilight cast: Rob edition post. Scroll down to the picture I said reminds me of Robin Williams (*shudder*) to see what I’m talking about.

Yeah, we are going to start with the not-so-good, so we still have the second set to use for brain bleach.

These are from Entertainment Weekly. I love this magazine. When I was a kid, I used to steal it from my mom’s room to look at the pictures. They are still taking gorgeous pictures, so I have to give props where they are due.

But I still don’t know what they were thinking asking Rob to do all these weird poses. Like I’ve said previously, there is nothing wrong with being gay at all, more power to ya and all that, but I don’t want to think of Rob like that (and I don’t mean that like I won’t go see Little Ashes. I’m currently on the prowl for a theater around here to show it). He to me is the epitome of sexy manliness, and I don’t want to see him doing all these ghey pants poses.

The entire gallery can be seen here. Go there and visit so I don’t get more emails from Coppermine saying I can’t use their pictures. That’s pretty ghey pants (Oh yeah, I say ghey pants now). 

I'm the king of the world!

This one isn’t so bad. I kinda like it. Rob looks cute, and I love the suspenders. Idk, I’m weird.

OK, still good. But getting a tad homosexual with the crossed ankles.

Umm, ok. Still crossing the ankles I see. Rob. No. I feel like they should have switched poses. 

Hey bitch! I said switch poses, not act like your ass is glued to his hip and stare lovingly at his sexy jawline! That’s MY sexy jaw to admire! Back the F off.

I just...can't bear this *looks away*

Oh God. Here it is. The picture that really promted me to write that post. I hate it. I just do. I hate the pose he’s doing, with the popped hip and the wtf fingers, and his face here makes me think of Robin Williams, who is very nice and all, but not hot.

Geez. The photographer really must have loved that weird finger thing, because he’s doing it again.

And again…

And again. My Lord. I just don’t understand. That’s why I love this next picture so much. It’s like he’s thinking, “WTF, the weird hands again?”

"You know, my hands can do other poses..."

OK, I’m so done with this photoshoot. Here’s one I actually thought was hot.

Work it

 

Hell yes. Do me with your eyes Rob. I love it.

Next, there are the outtakes from the VMan photoshoot. This is one of my favorite ones of all the cast, and it didn’t hurt that Rob looks absolutely delicious in it. I love the ones with the plastic vampire teeth!

This picture is pure Rob. Kinda dirty, scruffy, messy, cigarette hanging out of his sexy mouth, and he just doesn’t give a fuck. Loves it.

Did you hear that? That sound was my panties hitting the floor as I looked at this. I had no control over it, they just removed themselves of their own accord since there should never be a need for clothing around this kind of hotness. His hair alone is a work of art. Combines with the scruff, the eyebrows, those lips…*thud*

Another dirty Rob pic. He looks a little like the crazy hobo on the street, but somehow that’s sexy. I think he is the only guy on earth who could make me consider resemblance to the homeless hot.

So handsome. So serious.

I like it better when he smiles! Plus, he looks like he’s laughing here, and a guy who can laugh at himself is always hot.

Check out the rest of the album in the link above. There are 45 pictures of pure Rob-liciousness.

-Whitley

 

Wal-Mart Sucks

No one was more exited for the Twilight merch to hit Wal Mart than me. Jeremy and I do all our grocery shopping there, and we go there A LOT. I was looking forward at having access to new (and cheap!) Twilight stuff like the buttons and bags.

I called Wal Mart several times a week trying to find out when the launch of their “Twilight store” would be. I’m sure the employees hated me. I kind of hated them back. No one would ever give me a straight answer. Sometimes I heard, “Come  tomorrow.”. Other times I heard, “Um..I’m not sure…”, like they had no idea what Twilight even was, but they knew about the rabid fangirls, and they were trying to give me an answer that would keep me calm.

Finally, the week it launched, Jessie and I went to her Wal Mart and bought a whole bunch of buttons, tees and bags. I was pretty pleased with the selection, and the prices too (6 buttons for 5 bucks, when 1 button costs 2.99 at Hot Topic!). When I got back home, I saw that my Wal Mart had pretty much the same merchandise and I looked forward to going with Jeremy so we could look at all of it together (plus so he could buy me stuff too).

So that brings us to tonight. Jeremy is gone, in New York City again for a big work project (blah), so after I got out of class tonight, I decided to go to Wal Mart and buy myself some Twilight buttons or something to cheer myself up.

You would not believe what I encountered there if you didn’t have photographic proof, so I took pictures. Excuse the crappy cell phone camera quality.

This is what I saw first, on the wall for the T shirts.

Ok, that’s fine. Four shirts to choose from. That’s cool. Usually the buttons are on display right next to the shirts, but they weren’t there. A bunch of fug purses were instead. Ok, maybe the buttons were moved. I turned around to look for them.

Umm, ok. No buttons, only one thing Twilight related on the entire shelf, and some boxes shoved in the way. 

And this was on the shelf they have for the books and the movie. Instead, as you can see, there are Doritos, which have nothing to do with Twilight whatsoever.

It didn’t get better. The shirts and that one bag were the only Twilight related things in the FUCKING TWILIGHT SECTION. No buttons, no books, no posters, no keychains, NOTHING.

Of course, I shouldn’t have been surprised. When I turned away from the so called “Twilight section” and walked away, I noticed there was SHIT on the floor. Like, actual shit. It looked like someone had tracked it in on their shoe, so I’m going to assume it was of the dog variety, but I didn’t stay to investigate. I left, disgusted in more ways than one, and started planning a phone call to Wal Mart to ask them WTF is up with all of that.

Has anyone else had this problem at their Wal Mart? I hope you haven’t had the same experiece with the shit, but how is your Wal Mart at keeping Twilight stuff stocked? Or is your Twilight store like mine, dusty and pretty much forgotten?

-Whitley

C U L8r Sexy *EDIT*

 That’s the text Rob was sending me when this picture was taken.  He was just letting me know he was coming over later to have another one of our super fun sleepovers.

Look at that bitch in the leather jacket pretending like she isn’t trying to rub her ass on him. STEP OFF MY MAN, WHORE!

Seriously, it looks like someone took this picture using flash in a dark bar. How weird that must be for him when he can’t even hang out in dark places without being virtually harassed. It’s times like this when I get worried that he’s going to get so (understandably) sick of all the crazy attention and just drop off the face of the earth and live in obscurity the rest of his life.

Like when all those rumors were going around that he never showers? Seriously people, that is ridic. He said that like, A MILLION years ago in an interview before Twilight came out when he was asked how he got his hair to look like that. He wasn’t freaking serious! And now that there is virtually no news with New Moon to report, some bored people had to go dig all that back up again and try to make something out of it. 

Sometimes, I really despise being part of a fandom that is made up of mostly 13 year old girls. But then I go and re-read Twilight and I shake it off.

*EDIT*

I took the picture down because it has since been revealed that the picture was taken without Rob’s permission with the intent of giving to the press, and that’s just wrong. Im not going to support that, since it is exactly what I was writing about in the post above. If you really want to see the picture (it’s nothing sensational, just Rob trying to send a text message in private), I’m sure you can find it with google. I used a picture of my cat being a lazy beotch instead. Thanks PillowBiters, for keeping me in the loop!

-Whitley

BAD Pictures of the Twilight Cast: Rob Edition

Yes, they do exist.

I considered doing a post about my favorite pictures of Rob and the rest of the cast, but I figured we’d be here all day since that list is never ending. But then I thought a post of pictures of them that I hate would be of a reasonable length, plus it’s just funnier. These are the pictures that, whenever I see them on random blogs or in a montage for a youtube video, I avert my eyes quickly and just pretend I never saw it. First I will do Rob (hahaha, I wish), then next week I will write about Kristen, Kellan and so on.

I’m going to apologize in advance for any trauma this post may cause you. I reccomend having the Vanity Fair or Entertainment Weekly photoshoots open in another tab to wash your eyes out.

We’re going to start with Rob, but I have a confession to make. Before I got into Twilight, before I read the book but I knew they were making a movie, I would read the gossip on the internet about it because I knew my mom was excited for it and I was looking for stuff to send her. I had seen pictures of Rob in these articles, but I…I didn’t think he was hot.

THERE. I said it.

It’s not that I thought he was ugly or anything, because I certainly didn’t. I just didn’t see what the big deal was. But also, I had only seen pictures of him like the ones at the Sex Drive premiere where he was looking slightly high and sweaty. I thought his hair was pretty cool, and he had an interesting face, but that was about it. It wasn’t until I saw him in action as Edward that I realised just how sexy he really is.

I said that because I want to make it clear that I am not like some of Rob’s fans who think that EVERY SINGLE THING he has ever done is TOTALLY HOTT!, and I can understand and laugh at his imperfections because he is human, like all of us.

So first, I saw this picture last night on Robsessed and it made me laugh my ass off. The link to the picture is here (http://www.robsessedpattinson.com/2008/11/so-he-can-take-bad-picture.html) and the here is the actual picture.

Just...wow

This makes me speechless. How did he do that with his beautiful face? It’s like half his face is really happy to be there, and the other side is just like “meh” about it. There is no explanation for this. Was he unaware that a picture was being taken of him and his weird eyed friend there? That can’t be it because they are facing and looking at the camera, posing for a picture. Was he TRYING to make an ugly face as a joke? Because I am not laughing, Rob. (Oh wait, I actually am. If you follow the link and click on the picture, it gets way bigger and it had me laughing until I couldn’t breathe). No matter what the reason, Rob, please never make this face again, and all will be right in my universe. Kthanx.

I hate this picture so much, it actually pains me to look at it. His face reminds me of Robin Williams, which is very confusing for me to see when I’m ready to be feeling lustful from seeing a picture of Rob. It’s a little traumatizing to me. What makes me the maddest about this picture is I’m sure every other picture they took of him during this shoot was gorgeous. I mean, you have the most beautiful man alive as the subject and it’s pretty hard to go wrong with that, but they did. Like, what is he doing with his fingers in this picture? And the way his hips are like jutting to one side? Was he…dancing? If so, I need to make a mental note (Note to self, when Rob and I get married, there will be no dancing at our wedding. NONE). I don’t like this picture because it is a tad homosexual looking and even though there is nothing wrong with that, I just can’t bare to stand the thought of my precious Rob gay. It would be trauma I went through when Lance Bass came out times 1000.

I don’t get this. When I first saw this picture ages ago, it took me a few seconds of looking to see that there was a bow in there, and that it wasn’t just his hair all balled up. I was genuinely horrified and confused for a moment, but then I was like, “But wait…why… is there a…bow in it?”

This was the night of the VMA’s when I personally thought Rob was looking extremely hot. His hair and his outfit and the amount of stubble was PERFECT. But in this picture, he looks more like a zombie than a vampire.

That’s enough for now. Too many bad pictures of him will kill the soul. Here’s something for all of us to help with the pain.

There now. A GOOD picture from the VMA’s. I feel better.

-Whitley

WTF Is This Shiz?!?! UPDATE: Summit says no Madonna in New Moon

What the hell is this? I mean, words cannot describe my puzzlement at the news today from pretty much everywhere that Madonna might be in New Moon. My first thought was WHY? I can’t even imagine how anything from Madonna would be appropriate for anything in the Twilight universe. Maybe a song  on the soundtrack…? But I just don’t get it.

I’m feeling apprehensive about this movie. I started to feel little twinges of unease when Catherine was out. Then when they replaced her with Chris Weitz. (Who I only know from American Pie which was a great movie and all, but just completely NOT the direction for New Moon AT ALL). But I decided to just wait and see what was going to happen, I didn’t want to judge before I saw what the end product.

BUT THEN, there was the entire mess when they weren’t sure if they were going to keep Taylor Lautner for Jacob Black. I’m no Team Jacob member, not even close, but to me, that should never have even been a question at all. He is the perfect Jacob! WTF would be the point of getting someone else to play the part? Just because he gets taller and bulkier really fast? Hello? It’s called working out? And boys his age grow up really fast anyway, so they can age just a year, but look like 5 years older physically. I was really really worried about them not keeping him, but thankfully, that was all worked out and I will say that Taylor is looking very buff and adult. If I were 5 years younger… But since I’m not, I can lust after Rob guilt free, since we are the same age!

And now this Madonna thing. The article says that her manager Guy Oseary is an executive producer on the movie (since when? did he work on Twilight too?) and no one is clear yet if she is going to act or sing on the soundtrack.

Let’s see. If Madonna really HAS to be involved with the movie (and does she really? I mean really? What is the point?) then I would settle with her being on the soundtrack. I have a few of her songs on my Ipod (Ray of Light is awesome for cardio) and I really like a few of her ballads too.  So I could deal with her singing a song or two, as long as it was good and appropriate.

But I couldn’t deal with her being in the actual movie, possibly in a scene with Edward. That would just not do. The only thing I could imagine her playing is a member of the Volturi (which one, though?) because she has that toned look that is a little creepy, so I could picture her being a vampire. But please God, I really hope they do not write in some extra part for her or something and just screw the whole thing up. I don’t think Stephanie would let that happen, but there could be pressure from Summit or something.

I don’t know, I just hope everything works out with the movie and they include the parts of the book that NEED to be there (post on that later).

-Whitley

http://www.theinsider.com/news/1694304_Madonna_To_Suck_Blood_Out_Of_Twilight_Sequel_New_Moon

 

UPDATE: 

I checked Lexicon about 5 minutes ago and they have the news that says Summit said directly Madonna will NOT be acting in New Moon, her involvement, if at all, will be just on the soundtrack.

http://weblogs.variety.com/thompsononhollywood/2009/02/truth-or-dare-madonna-not-in-new-moon-pattinson-efron-on-oscars-spielbergs-lincoln.html

*GIANT SIGH OF RELIEF* 

-Whitley

Seriously, WTF?

OK, so I realize that being 20 years old and and obessed as I am about Twilight makes me a little weird, but mostly only to those who haven’t read the books. I have a kindred feeling with all the other Twilighters out there who are just as fanatical as I am, and who can understand how seeing a silver Volvo (THE silver Volvo) is actually enough to change your mood for the entire day. 

But then there are those among us who are just frightening. They are the reason the rest of the world thinks we are CRAZY. And I really can’t blame them, because some of the shit I see out there in online Twilight universe  just boggles the mind.

For instance, today I was doing my daily check of Twilighers Anonymous and I came across this little gem.

http://twilightersanonymous.com/cinematical-fan-made-bella-womb-from-breaking-dawn-twilight.html

Here are the pictures that go along with that article.

 

This is the womb closed (I think)

and this is it OPEN, complete with a FETUS inside

 That is Bella’s womb, when she was pregnant with Renesmee in Breaking Dawn. That is pretty much the grossest thing I have ever seen in my life. What would posses a person to create something like that? How long did that take? And then WHY did they feel they needed to take pictures and share it with the rest of the world? 

I can’t decide what the grossest thing about it is. The fact that it’s red and brown, with a little mutated fetus inside, or all of that combined with the fact that it’s FURRY? It looks like some crazy dinosaur egg or something from a horror movie.

If you have seen anything that tops this in the weirdness and grossness factor (and I really hope you haven’t), let us know, because I don’t understand what could top this.

-Whitley